Weeks of Work Up Fun!

I just finished my first set of work ups. For all my civi friends (those of you who aren't in the military, more specifically, the NAVY) work ups is a few weeks where the ship's company learns a crazy amount of information, does lots of excercises and evolutions, and we're being evaluated to see how well we do.

We did lots of fire, flood, and man overboard excercises. Don't worry mom, they were all simulated. The ship is very safe. Except for all the bungee cords of course. Who knew that you should wear CSA approved safety glasses to take out the garbage. I may have gotton a minor black eye in the incident.

I was recently asked by one of my sister's students if hampsters power our boats. Now, you may be thinking this is the future of the Canadian NAVY but I guess we're still old fashioned and still use diesel engines, on my boat anyways. So if something goes wrong it's the engineers to the rescue! I like to think we're super heros. Our team of highly trained professionals can make potatoes float, toilettes flush, and catch candy in our mouths: well, some of us.

Work ups was a challange. Long days. Sleep is always interupted by bong bongs (fire alarm) or shakes. (On the ship we don't use alarm clocks so you get shaken, or woken up) Being evaluated always adds stress too. It's like playing a hockey game with refs who can't make up their minds what the rules are and are always getting in the way.

We kept a record of things during Edmonton Workups. Most come from within the engineering department but we had some great input from other sources too. Some may be a bit confusing. I'll try to explain some of them.

"Eating a dead hooker would not stop me from eating bacon" -Pigs eat the hooker. You eat the pig
"It feels like there are two monkeys in my head and only one banana" -Saturday morning in Seattle.
"I love it when you put your fingers into it"
"I've turned over a new valve"
"I had a fluctuating boogie"
"Somebody get me some water - I can't dry swallow"
"I like it in the hole" - the Z-drive compartment of course
"it was quiet as a bell" -How quiet is a bell?
"This is where it gets really cool" -durring a stability lecture and the ship is flooding
"Quit being such a fucking baby" -after a discussion about the duties of the harassment advisor
"Don one on"
"A friendly hug is OK, a friendly grope is not." -First aid lecture
"It's time for a progrep report"
"If you were a girl would you wear that?" - Said to a girl
"46 hours left. No less than that, 47"
"I'm only working here to pay off my implants"
"I'll put it ini my mouth" "I'll put it in my moth"
"Put it back in Ponath"
"This is not your Daddy's yacht, Princess"
"Ensure you visually touch every line" -very specific instructions
"What would you rather have: A million dollars or Ponath's head full of nickels"
"Dog semen . . . do you know what that tastes like?"